Martin's Phone Plight
by Tempeck2
Summary: You know the problem with owning a phone? Losing it. What happens when Martin has a slight problem with keeping tabs on the items he owns? Hilarity. Thanks for reading.:


**This is my first Without a Trace story that I wrote in like 20 minutes. I like it. I hope you will too. I simple do not think that there are enough Martin-humor stories out there. Thanks for reading. I don't own anyone or the anything in the story. **

"Has anybody seen my phone?"

Agent Martin Fitzgerald, the usually composed agent of the MPU, rips document after document out of his desk in search of his missing phone.

Normally it wouldn't even matter if he didn't have his phone by his side 24/7, but Jack had growled at him verbatim: "Martin, this is the third phone in as many months. Don't lose this one or you'll be on probationary desk duty for the rest of your career."

Martin fully expected that Jack was over exaggerating his threat, but he didn't want to test the man.

So here he was ripping through more junk than he thought he had in search of his lost phone.

If he would have look up at what his colleagues were doing; he would have seen Sam completely ignoring him, in an attempt to get her report finished before her departure. He would have seen Viv looking at him and shaking her head slightly at his plight. He would have seen Danny on the brink of laughing out loud because for once it was the 'perfect agent' in trouble for doing something. Danny had long since gotten over the fact that Martin was the boss' boss' kid, but that didn't mean he couldn't laugh at his friend when things like this happened. Jack was no where in sight, which Martin was all too happy about, because of the aforementioned conversation between the two. And the rest of the agency simple ignored what ever the problem was.

Since it was a paperwork day and there was no case that needed solving; Martin looked feverishly for his phone, but alas to no avail.

At this point, his desk was askew. He had papers from different cases in several different thrown together piles. His clothes were all rumpled. His blazer was hung unceremoniously on the back of his chair. His tie was hanging loosely around his neck. His shoes were missing. And his hair was thrown in several different directions like he had been out in a terrible wind storm. (Why his shoes were missing was a mystery to everyone)

It had been just over two and a half hours since the case of the missing phone moved to his top priority and still he had no leads. He checked his coat, his desk, the cars in the garage, the break room, and everywhere else in between. He had no clue as to where his phone went.

By this time, his friends and colleagues had noticed that he actually needed help and that he was becoming very stressed because of his missing phone.

"Have you looked in the break room?" Danny suggested from where he is leaning on the desk across from Martin's. He started to help look when he saw that Martin had taken to slumping forward in his chair and that he had put his elbows on his knees and his head between his hands.

"Yes." Martin answers distractedly as he looks down at his feet. "Hey, where are my shoes?"

"Don't know." Sam says lightly as she comes over and sits in a chair next to Martin's desk. "Are you sure it isn't at your apartment?"

"Yeah, I went home during lunch and looked. I turned my apartment upside down looking for it. It's not there either." Martin says standing suddenly and leaning over his desk. "Seriously, has anyone seen my shoes?"

Danny and Sam both shake their heads, 'No', and Martin starts to pace in between the his desk and the one across from it.

"Maybe if you just sit down and relax it will come to you and you won't have an aneurism about it." Viv says as she comes over just in time to see Martin freaking out about his missing phone. "Martin, will you please calm down. You're wearing a hole in the floor."

"I can't. Jack said that if I lose this one... there will be undesirable consequences." Martin says as he continues to pace.

"Undesirable? Fitz-" Danny starts to taunt, but is cut off abruptly by Martin's intense glare that he sends Danny's way. "Never mind." Danny says retreating to silence.

"Where could it be? I usually don't lose things-" Martin is stopped mind sentence by three separate skeptical glances sent his way. "Well, I didn't usually lose things before I started working here."

Martin continues to rant while gesturing wildly around, grabbing his hair, and working in some words that all three agents that were watching this display of frustration, knew were not English.

All while this was going on, a group of people who looked all too bright eyed and bushy tailed to actually work at MPU, strode past the four agents as they were following a person that looked kind of like a tour guide.

"And here we have three of our top Missing Persons Unit Agents watching the tolls of the inevitable frustration that will soon be devouring and controlling your lives, take their colleague chew him up and spit him out. You too may soon be murmuring to no one in particular, ripping out your hair, and missing your shoes." The guide says as he leads the now traumatized horror filled Junior Agents away. "And walk this way. Please and Thank You."

"Gees Marty, traumatizing the agents of tomorrow. Good job." Danny says as he snickers to himself. "Maybe you could catch up with the group and instill the values of keeping your cell phone on your person or in eyesight, while you still have a job."

Martin turns toward Danny with his hands running down his face and says in a practiced sarcastic tone, "Haha. You laugh about it, the kids laugh about it, the dog laughs about it, and I die a little inside."

Danny outright laughs and says, "_Family Guy_ reference. Nice one."

Sam and Viv both shake their heads but smirk a little at the exchange between their two friends.

Martin turns to pace in the opposite direction, but miscalculates his steps and accidentally jams his toe on the leg of his desk. He hops up and down a few times and grabs his foot. After a couple of seconds and well placed glares sent to his friends for laughing; Martin sits down and slumps in his chair again.

"Come on guys, brainstorm. Jack said that he'd be back down to check our progress on paperwork at 10:30. It's now 10:08. I need ideas." Martin says putting his sleeve back over his watch and turning toward his friends with an expectant look.

"Okay. So you've checked pretty much everywhere right?" Viv asks as she hands Martin an few papers that fell off of his desk. He nods and looks pretty much like someone just drowned his puppy. "Well, you lost it last night, right?" Viv asks and Martin nods again. "Why don't we go and ask Sid if he's seen it, and if not, then we start worrying."

Viv, Danny, and Sam all nod in agreement and get up to go and find 'Sid'.

"Wait... who's Sid?" Martin asks still being relatively new to the building and not quite remembering there every being a mention of a 'Sid'.

"Sid's the head of security here at the HQ. He knows everything that goes in the lost and found, and everything that comes out." Danny explains.

"Security... like security guards? We have those? And... there's a lost and found?" Martin asks as he follows his friends deeper into the building to where Sid the security guard is stationed.

"Yeah, there's a lost and found. Why is that weird?" Sam asks as they turn the corners of the building to navigate the building.

"Well... I mean... we're the Missing Persons Unit, and we have a lost and found. Doesn't that strike anyone else as... I don't know, odd." Martin says thoughtfully as he continues to follow his friends.

Viv and Sam both send quizzical looks at Martin but Danny nods his head and says, "Lost and found, Missing Persons... yeah, I see the irony in that."

They finally get to Sid's station and see an older, slightly balding looking gentlemen in an outfit that clearly screams, 'I'm a security guard. Don't mess with me'.

Viv, Danny, and Sam all greet Sid and exchange pleasantries. Danny introduces Martin to Sid and explains Martin's plight.

"So you're missing somethin' are ya?" Sid says in an accent that leads Martin believe that he may have been born and raised in New York.

"Yes, sir. My cell phone. I think I lost it last night and I was wondering if you might have stumbled onto it at some point." Martin says hopefully as he watches the older man shift into a thoughtful look.

"Hmm... let's see. A cell phone. Was it... Gray?"

"Yes."

"Was it about the size of small box?"

"Yes."

"Did it have the word, 'Fitz', on the back of it?"

"Yes! Yes, that's it!"

"Nope, don't have it here." Sid says as he rubs his chin oblivious to the death glare being sent his way by Agent Fitzgerald. "I think I did see one like that some time ago, but no it's not here. Sorry about that sonny."

Martin takes a deep, calming breath and says, "S'okay, Sid. Thanks for trying. If you do find one exactly like that, give me a call wouldja?"

Everybody thanks Sid and the four agents depart back to the bullpen.

Martin looks at his watch that reads: 10:32. He drops his head back into his hands. He stares at the ground for a minute, and then jerks his head back up. "_Mierda_. I forgot to ask about my shoes." Martin says. The first word out of his mouth had both Viv and Sam confused, but Danny just smirked slightly at it.

Martin is just about to go back through the maze of their building to ask Sid about his shoes when Jack sticks his head out of his office. "Fitzgerald. My office. Now."

Martin freezes for the tiniest second before taking a small breath and straightening himself up. He grabs his blazer that Danny holds out for him. He smiles slightly at his co-workers and walks up to Jack's office.

"Um... yeah boss." Martin says as he walks into the office.

"Would you like to explain to me why a group of terrified junior agents scattered out of here, and why people have been putting up posters all over the office that say, 'Phone lost. If found please contact Martin Fitzgerald. (office phone) Reward: up to 25 dollars'?" Jack says as he reads off of a piece of paper. He looks up at his Agent and sees a confused look morph into one of annoyance.

'Dammit Danny.' Martin thinks annoyed.

"By that look, I can only assume that Danny had something to do with the posters, but scaring Junior agents, and... Martin. Where is your phone?" Jack asks in a low tone. He looks expectantly at his agent and sees him gulp slightly at the mention of his phone.

Martin gulps and glances around to avoid looking at Jack's penetrating glare. He stalls for a few seconds before something catches his eye on Jack's desk. He's about to say something but Jack cuts him off as he starts his ranting about Martin's inability to keep his phone on his person.

"Martin, I swear to God. What did I tell you when I gave you that phone?" Jack yells as he watches his subordinate flinch slightly at his tone.

"Um..." Martin says preparing to point out his finding to Jack.

"No Martin, I said, 'Do not lose this.' And what do you do? Hm... I told you not to lose that phone."

"Um Boss..." Martin starts but is cut off again.

"Do I sound like I'm finished?" Jack asks rhetorically.

"But Boss..." Martin tries but Jack continues.

"That's it! Agent Fitzgerald if you can not keep track of your items when we are not in the field, then I'll just have to put you on desk duty until you can." Jack says in a tone that suggests that he doesn't particularly like punishing his agents.

"Boss!" Martin yells finally breaking through the constant rant.

"What?" Jack growls.

"Why do you have two phones on your desk?" Martin asks smirking slightly.

"What?" Jack asks as he looks down at his desk. He sees that he has more than one phone on his desk. He picks up the one that is unfamiliar to him. He sees that it's gray, small, and has the word, 'Fitz', scribbled on the back.

Jack looks at the phone and then at his agent. Back at the phone, and then back at his agent. Martin can't help but have a slight smirk on his face but to his credit he does keep the full blown smile off.

"Well... I believe this belongs to you." Jack hands Martin his phone but does not look him in the eyes instead he chooses to study the floor. "You're dismissed."

Martin takes his phone and says, "Yes, sir." He's about to walk out of Jack's office when suddenly he hears his name being called again. He leans back into the doorway and asks, "Yes, sir?"

Jack looks questioningly from the ground to Martin's face and asks one simple question:

"Martin... where are your shoes?"

'Dammit. Back to the lost and found.' Martin thinks dejectedly as he walks out of Jack's office, past his friends, and down the maze of hallways once again.

-fini-

**Well, there it was. If you have any questions please press review, if you liked this story please press favorite and review, if you simple would like to know what the word, '_mierda_' means please press review... or look it up on google translate. Hint... it's Spanish. (And then press review) Thanks again for reading. Bye. **


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